Maybe Adele is singing about her cats. You don’t know.
I have an oven with a ‘stop time’ button. It’s probably meant to be ‘stop timer’ but I don’t touch it, just in case.
Whoever says Paper beats Rock is an idiot. Next time I see someone say that I will throw a rock at them while they hold up a sheet of paper
My friend used to play sports. Then she realized you can buy trophies. Now she’s good at everything.
Next time you see someone you don’t like, begin conversation with “I see the assassins have failed.”