Your daily dose of unadulterated funny tweets
We're redesigning Funny Tweeter. Your feedback is always welcome. Talk to us at @funTweeters
@sofarrsogud : [TRYING TO IMPRESS NEW GIRLFRIEND]
'Oh yeah, I love to cook!'
*removes salad from the microwave
@sofarrsogud: My therapist advised me to feed and water my kids and cook my plants 3 meals a day.
And something about listening.
You hang up..
No, you hang up...
You hang up....
Noooo, you hang up. They're your clothes. I'm not your maid.