Eggs Benedict implies the exsistence of Eggs Cumberbatch
A Free Range Chicken is easy to spot due to it’s backpack & rugged little hiking boots
Got Fired by the Zoo for Giving all the Meerkats Tiny Binoculars
“Women & Children first” i yell heroically from the Dentist’s waiting room
Electric eels imply the existence of Acoustic eels
I wonder what the ocean smelled like before it was full of fish
[After Sex]
Him: how was it for you?
Shakira’s hips: well…
Imagine if Spiders could Breakdance
Got Fired by the Zoo for Teaching all the Sloths Tai Chi
Me: *tips the waiter*
Waiter: *angrily climbing out the lobster tank*
Me: [forgetting the word coconut] one hairy bowling ball please
[IKEA-themed restaurant]
Maitre-d: is your table ready yet?
Me: you say your dog’s a boxer?
Friend: yeah
Me: [eyes narrow] how does he lace his gloves up?
[First day waiting tables]
Customer: do you have wings?
Me: *flaps elbows* no, just regular arms
A Vampire Bat is easy to spot due to its funny accent and little silk cape