you would not believe that one of the reasons i’m most excited to move out is so i can own a bean bag in every room of my house
shoutout to sookie stackhouse. she resisted eric northman for 3 seasons whereas i would have had my neck exposed, ready to be sucked like a capri sun as soon as he looked my way
kinda rude that my bank told me how much money i spent on food this month. what if i didn’t want to know that
if you have a cat tell them i said pspspsps
how do people have 15 minute naps?? if i’m napping, i’ll sleep through an earthquake and the entire lord of the rings trilogy
white people in horror movies when they find an ancient book with written spells: it’s time to read this out loud. i am not capable of reading this in my head or closing the book. i must shout it from the rooftops with a megaphone
me at a restaurant
waiter: here’s ur cup 🙂
me: oh thank you
waiter: *puts down cup*
me: thank you
waiter: *fills cup up with water*
me: thank you
waiter: i’ll be back soon with your food
me: thank you
how did chucky manage to murder so many people??? just pick him up and yeet him in the bin. he’s a doll