The best thing about snow is that now my lawn looks as good as the neighbor’s.
If ever a burglar entered my house, I take comfort in knowing they’d never get past the 17 pairs of shoes in the hallway.
Apparently, saying “grande” in a non-Starbucks coffee shop is like shouting the wrong name during sex.
If anyone breaks in, I take comfort in knowing they’ll never get past the 20 pairs of shoes in the hallway.