@GrantTanaka: We should probably abolish the death penalty since we don't even get to throw rotten vegetables at people anymore
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@WheelTod: [First Date. Full moon] Her: You looked different in your profile picture. Werewolf: I forgot to check the calendar
@joshgondelman: "At least you're going to get a lot of material out of this," is comedian-speak for, "Sorry about your life, dude."
@VectorBelly: I like when the ending credits show pictures from the episode I just watched. What a fun trip down memory lane.
@PetrickSara: Me: Who drew the picture? 8: I can't remember her name. Me: You memorize 200 Pokémon but you don't remember the kids names in class? 8: 213