Your word is Monogamous.
*2 Judges stare at each other*
1st judge *nods*
2nd judge: “We’ll allow it”
Whatever, Twitter makes me a safer driver. Now I stop at every red light, even the lights that I think may change in the next minute or two.
You Might Also Like
Since they won’t vote anyway, Obama should make the GOP look bad by nominating a bald eagle holding a picture of Jesus to the Supreme Court.
Doctor: this might hurt a little bit
Doctor: i like you, but only as a friend
When I’m in a bathroom stall, please don’t yell “Oh my God oh my God there’s a guy in here!” Respect my privacy.
The worst part of seeing a spider in the shower was the way it covered it’s eyes when it saw me.
Hell hath no fury like a teenage girl who perfected her right eyebrow but not the left one.
FRIEND: OMG I’m so glad to get away from my kids for a bit
ME: haha yeah I don’t think I’ll ever have kids
FRIEND: no it’s the best
My she-ro of the day is the project lead who turned on her camera during today’s group Skype meeting.
So it’s okay for the cat to run away and hide under the bed when visitors turn up.
But when I do it, I’m “antisocial”.
I call bullshit.
Some people wouldn’t understand irony if it beat them over the head with a helmet.