@JimmerThatisAll: When I was a child I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child but when I became a man I put away none of those things
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@okimstillhungry: Me on Masterchef: Ive made a roasted pork kebab breaded with buttermilk cornbread and served with a tomato reduction Them: This is a corndog
@NicholeGunz: i opened a savings account in 2008 with a $25 deposit. i've watched the money grow over the last decade, and though i've been tempted, i've left it alone. now i have $27.96, enough to retire on. take note.
@shhrugg: If I was hanging off a cliff for my life and you told me to take your hand I would stop screaming to tell you I'm afraid of intimacy