*weigh myself on different scales and am two pounds lighter*
Ah these are more accurate…
when wolves raise a human child no one cares, but when i raise a wolf as my child and send it to elementary school everyone freaks out
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What do you get if you cross a bear and a wolf? You get eaten is what you get. Stop upsetting scary animals.
I wouldn’t say I’m emotionally needy, but I do set the thermostat real low so my cat has to huddle with me for warmth.
Was standing in my front yard this evening and some neighborhood kids tried to deflate me.
X – Single
X – Married
X – It’s complicated
X – In a relationship
✅ – Not falling for that shit again…
(Me playing guitar)
3: Daddy what’s this song called?
Me: Going Nowhere.
3: I know that but what’s this song called?
Burned by a 3yo.
Cannibals are so full of themselves and other people
Sex so good the peeping Tom made sandwiches.
Can me and you go out sometime?
“No, your grammar is too poor”
Ok wow, my gramma broke af, but what that got to do with us?