@jonnysun: whenever i watch the tv show Friends, i imagine im the seventh friend, Dirk, who just stays home while all his friends do stuff without him
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@NewDadNotes: God: you’re a decapod. Crab: what does that mean? God: it means you have 10 legs. Crab: b-but that’s too many legs. God: at least you don’t have a hundred. Crab: why would someone have a hundred legs? Centipede: yes God why would someone have a hundred legs?
@internetluke: My work day - 8:00-11:30 - wonder what I'll eat for lunch today 11:30 - 12:00 - eat lunch 12:00 - 4:30 - Damn lunch was good.