@flashember: [Wildebeest being lowered Mission Impossible-style from a helicopter to graze the grasses of Buckingham Palace]
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@daplusk: [on 1st date] Me: Have you ever flown to Paris on a private jet before? Her: No, I'd love to Me: Same Me: *shows photo of cat* this is Tim
@ceejoyner: 75% of a Scandinavian park ranger's job is rescuing black metal bands that get lost in the woods shooting album covers.