@DevilryFun: Wish a poltergeist would move in so there'd be someone else to blame when I lose my shit.
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@TheAuthorGuy: Much as I like Guardians of the Galaxy, in real life, I don't think it's a good idea to give a gun to a raccoon.
@cupofdrink: gonna make a dog training school and call it harvard so people who went to harvard always have to say "no the one for people"
@XplodingUnicorn: Door-to-door Christian guy: Jesus loves you. Me: Really? Just me? Him: Well, no. He loves everyone. Me: I don't have time for players.