@jctwritesstuff: Y'all say redheads eat souls like it's a bad thing, but I'm telling you, this diet is really going to pay off come swimsuit season.
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@UnFitz: [horse walks into a bar] Bartender: Why the long face? H: The world is spiraling down the crapper. BT: You're supposed to say- H: Just pour.
@GensPlace: She was a very heavy smoker with a cough that curdled your blood. Phlegm fatale, they called her.